Buhtt sex?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
