I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I AM VODKA MAN
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Randomize
