he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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