I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
