Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
