a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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