no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
