talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
