some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
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