Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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