You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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