Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
