if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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