We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
