so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
