so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
