Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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