No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
