wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
She announced her abortion via fbk
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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