Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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