I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
