Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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