Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Found the puke drawer
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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