You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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