he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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