kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
