We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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