You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
