Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
