im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
