I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
