By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
