Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
