Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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