I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
