The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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