thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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