I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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