I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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