quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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