so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
