It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
