with your own penis?
It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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