I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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