I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Randomize
