Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
