If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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