i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
