Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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