i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
